THE RITUAL OF BANISHMENT

for when the curse is not enough. follow exactly. i am not liable.

YOU WILL NEED:

one (1) plain bagel. uneaten. untoasted.
one (1) printout of the enemies list
one (1) candle (the shrine candle will do)
silence. or as close to silence as your neighborhood permits.
a window

STEPS:

approach the window.
open it slightly. not all the way. {{TARGET}}-style.
light the candle.
hold the bagel aloft.
recite, in a normal speaking voice, three times: "i release {{TARGET}} to the void. they are no longer my problem. they are the void's problem."
lower the bagel.
place the enemies list on the windowsill. do NOT burn it. that is a fire hazard and this ritual respects fire code.
close the window.
eat the bagel. it is plain. you must confront its plainness.
blow out the candle.

EFFECTS:

the banishment will take effect within 30 to 90 business days. results not guaranteed. you may still encounter {{TARGET}} in dreams (which are cataloged separately).

this ritual has been performed 14 times by the webmaster with zero success rate. i continue on faith alone.

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