THE CURSE

(a minor hex. legally non-binding. spiritually: devastating.)


BY THE POWER INVESTED IN ME
BY NO ONE
BY THE AUTHORITY OF A SINGLE HTML FILE
I, FLEMLORD, DO HEREBY CURSE {{TARGET}}:

◆   may your socks always be slightly damp   ◆
◆   may your earbuds only work in one ear   ◆
◆   may every elevator you enter stop at every floor   ◆
◆   may every line you join be the slow line   ◆
◆   may your WiFi icon always show 1 bar, regardless of signal   ◆
◆   may your alarm fail only on the days it matters   ◆
◆   may your bagel be plain, forever, by no choice of your own   ◆
◆   may your charger cable be always this close to your bed but not close enough   ◆
◆   may every podcast you start be at episode 47 of 350   ◆
◆   may every door you push say PULL   ◆

SO IT IS SAID
SO IT IS WRITTEN
SO IT IS HTML

if this curse works, i will add it to the news. if it doesn't, we never speak of it.


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